Young Children

This website does not offer specialist advice in respect to sexual assault and abuse of young children and so we recommend you visit Kidscape, a national charity working to prevent bullying and child sexual abuse. Also visit our Library for other websites that offer help and advice for young people and children

The bullet points shown below were obtained from Crimestoppers, but it is believed they were originally provided by Kidscape

One sobering and important point made in Crimestopper’s introduction to these bullet points is that children are more likely to be victims of abuse in the home, or abused by someone else they know.

Also, children can be traumatised by witnessing domestic violence as much as children who are physically abused themselves.

You can help to keep your children safe by following this simple advice

Your child should:

• Be safe – Tell your children that they have the right to be safe. No-one can take that away from them
• Be believed – If your child wants your help, they need to know that they will be believed and supported. This is especially true in the case of sexual assault, as children rarely lie about it
• Protect their own bodies – Children must know that their bodies belong to them, especially the private parts covered by their swimsuits
• Not have secrets – Child molesters that the child knows often say that a kiss or a touch is ‘our secret'. Tell your children that some secrets should never be kept, even if they said they wouldn't tell
• Say no – Tell your children that it's all right to say ‘no' if someone tries to hurt them. A lot of children are told to always do what grown-ups tell them
• Refuse touches – Tell your children that they can say no to touching or kissing if they don't like it. If someone touches them and tells them to keep it a secret, they must tell you. Never force your child to hug or kiss anyone
• Get help against bullies – Bullies pick on younger, more vulnerable children. Tell children to get friends to help them and to say no without fighting. Make sure they tell a grown-up. Tell them to give up something a bully wants, such as a bike, if they are going to get hurt. Tell them you will not be angry if they come home without it
• Try not to talk to strangers – Most well-meaning adults will not approach a child who is on their own, unless they are obviously lost or distressed. Tell your children never to talk to strangers and to politely ignore any approach from a stranger. Get them to tell you if a stranger tries to talk to them
• Tell – Your children must always tell you what has happened and know that you will not be angry with them
• Break rules sometimes – Tell your children they can break rules to stay safe. They can run away, scream, lie or kick to get away from danger

I would also add that it is good to gently talk about all these things from an early age so that open discussion about such matters becomes the norm within the family setting.  Being a policeman I was very much aware of the risks children faced and we would often talk about ‘difficult’ subjects with our two boys during mealtimes when we were all gathered around the table.